Settling

I’ve written about refusing to settle in the past. As I search for something and especially this past week, it seems to be an appropriate topic and inspired by this one.

Again, refusing to settle doesn’t mean always waiting for perfect nor does it mean being “difficult” or refusing to compromise. What it does mean is never having to give up what you fundamentally believe in.

One of my friends believes that you should marry the person that’s, “good enough.” She explains it as the guy you’re dating that makes you feel okay, but not great. Her thought is, why wait, he (and your life together) will be average or okay. Every time she explains this theory I think, “WHAT?!? WHY?” I don’t get thinking like this, I guess I fundamentally don’t believe in “good enough” :)

Another example of this is the friend that after growing up and going to Catholic school converted to Judaism for her kids and marriage. Neither one a bad thing, but later in life, she stopped believing in Judaism… it wasn’t something she fundamentally believed in. Not only did she stop believing, but she started to resent her life and her husband for making her compromise a fundamental belief.

The moral? Be careful when you decide to settle, especially when it involves one of your fundamental beliefs. You might end up more miserable and resentful than if you had refused to settle in the first place.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

  • Anal Organization

  • Oldies But Goodies

  • More Stuff

  • Nonsense Notes