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By Vegasbab, February 14, 2010 5:11 pm

I have a lot of friends getting married. I also have a lot of friend getting divorced. They ask me what it’s like to be single, to live alone… Here goes:

The Pros:
It’s great. It’s everything you imagined about being autonomous. It’s always about you and your choices. Just remember not to become so selfish that you forget what others want and need (Sometimes, I’m guilty of this).

You can work or stay out as late as you want. You can walk around your house naked and no one will say a word. You can eat (or drink) whatever you want, whenever you want with no nagging.

Want to go to the movies? Go. Want to take a take a quick ski trip? No problem.

The Cons:
On really great days, you don’t have a built in person to come home and celebrate with. However, there’s always a friend or coworker who’s willing and ready to celebrate your good fortune with you.

But, then there’s the really bad days. On those days, there’s no one to come home to either. There’s no one to hug you or or get drunk with or hold you til you fall asleep. You learn a different “strength” in order to hold yourself.

Yes, every once in awhile, the eerily silent nights get to you. No amount of going out changes that, in fact, it makes it worse. It’s like being alone in a crowded room. But, again, you’ll learn a new “strength” to handle the eerie nights beautifully.

And every once in a blue moon, you’ll yearn to be held so badly that it will take every muscle in your body to make it through the night alone. Then, if you’re lucky, you’ll spend a day at the park (or wherever) with kids and you’ll know… everything’s gonna be alright.

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By Vegasbab, January 23, 2010 8:41 pm

Looking back on my posts from last January, I stumbled on this one. I thought it might be fun to update the project with my tweets from 2009. So, here it is, with @replies removed again. Thanks to TweetScan and Wordle for the fun and insights!

Worlde of Tweets from 2008:

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By Vegasbab, January 15, 2010 11:42 pm

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately. I know, you can probably see the smoke

We all think we’re going to be great and we feel a little bit robbed when our expectations aren’t met, but sometimes our expectations sell us short. Sometimes the expected simply pales in comparison to the unexpected. You’ve got to wonder why we cling to our expectations because the expected is just what keeps us steady, standing still, the expected is just the beginning. The unexpected is what changes our lives.

I want the unexpected. I want the challenge. I want to always be happy, but never satisfied enough to sit on my laurels. I want chaos and passion. I want to always be busier than I can handle. I don’t want everything to add up. I want good things to fall apart, so better things can fall together. And, if that’s truly what I want, then I need to take the leap again, and build a new set of wings on the way down.

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By Vegasbab, January 11, 2010 9:34 pm

I don’t believe in Ten Year Plans. There, I said it.

Back in 2006 life was rocky and I made my first and only ten year plan. Honestly, I don’t think any of it came to fruition. Granted, it wasn’t a bad thing, life just went in a different direction.

A few months ago, someone on twitter said, “I ignore all “5 year plans” [because]: 5 years ago, YouTube and Twitter didn’t exist, and Facebook was only for college kids.” While the statement only focuses on emerging media, it’s also how I feel about life. Why force yourself to stick to an outdated plan when you have no idea what tomorrow might bring?

Not that I remember it exactly, but I have a feeling if I had stuck to my plan I would be Editor-in-Chief of ESPN Magazine with some variation of the white-picket fence ideal. You know, the ideal that gets brainwashed into every suburban kid. Today? Those things couldn’t be further from what I want.

Today, I still don’t have a ten year plan. I don’t think I will ever make a plan; life has gone just fine without one. Not having a plan doesn’t mean you’re drifting nor have your eyes on a shoreline, it simply means you have your eyes on many shorelines and you’re not quite ready to miss out on that next big wave

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By Vegasbab, December 30, 2009 9:49 pm

Ugh. Four personal posts in a row. I really try not to do that. But…

I’ve been vacationing on home turf (Palm Beach) for the last week. For several reasons, it’s always tough to come and go. Although, I think many people feel the same way about visiting family and where they grew up.

So… combine coming home with the start of a new year (and decade), some big decisions and moves and you get a lot of jumbled thoughts, emotions and the possibility of defining moments. But, I’ve also been thinking that they’re not true defining moments. They’re moments that are “forced” because of new year “pressures” and fear.

I hate both.

I’m stubborn. I hate doing things half-assed. I hate being pressured. And I hate being told what to do. Yea… great combination, huh?

After the last three days, I can’t say things are becoming clearer. In fact, they are still quite muddled. But, I do think that “forcing” change or making a decision just because it’s a new year and that’s what you’re “supposed” to do is silly. Instead, I’m pausing. I’m waiting. And best of all, I’m choosing my defining moments; I’m not letting them choose me.

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By Vegasbab, December 28, 2009 1:00 pm

Ever since I published Cool Things of the Decade, I’ve been thinking about the events I chose and the reasons why. I wish I could better articulate why. I mean, why choose losing your virginity over the first time you said, “I love you” and meant it? Maybe I’m not such a romantic sap after all Maybe losing my virginity encompassed so many more memories

Anyway, there’s a lot of events I didn’t choose and there’s some intriguing ones that replaced them. It doesn’t make the events I didn’t select any less important. Past events help to shape your life, but they certainly don’t need to define your future.

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By Vegasbab, December 24, 2009 1:28 am

Like many, it hit me a bit late that this was the end of a decade. Although the Top 10 lists are overdone and even more so for the Decade Lists, I still wanted to document one cool thing for each year.

1. 2000: Named Editor of the Year
2. 2001: Lost my virginity
3. 2002: Became a Zeta… thanks Division I swim team!
4. 2003: Met my Back Alley Friend
5. 2004: Got a tattoo
6. 2005: Graduated from UM
7. 2006: Moved to Vegas
8. 2007: Met someone who I had to rearrange my mind for
9. 2008: Signed my first year-long lease
10. 2009: Became the youngest Director on the Las Vegas strip

Whew! It’s amazing the life events that happen over ten years. Looking back at these, there’s so many more unbelievably amazing memories, but I promised – one (happy) event per year, no combinations (ok, ok, I cheated for 2002) and none that came with an anniversary date.

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By Vegasbab, December 23, 2009 6:46 pm

While end of the year Top Ten lists get obnoxious, it sure is fun to look back on last year’s 10 Cool Things of 2008. I can’t believe it’s been a full year since making that list. But, here it is, ten cool things of 2009 (in date order):

1. I was a bridesmaid with my best friends
2. I started a new job… the youngest Director on the Vegas Strip
3. I got a hammock. I’m in love
4. I gave my first keynote presentation
5. I got invited to speak at many a conference in 2010
6. In a time when people were being laid off left and right, I got four job offers, all promotions
7. Thanks to the FIRST flash mob in a Vegas casino, I had a #1 video on YouTube
8. I visited a lot of new cities and a few old ones
9. I rediscovered skiing. I’m a total ski bum
10. I put myself out there for the first time. Ever. Fairy tale ending or not, at least I did it

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By Vegasbab, December 9, 2009 2:23 am

The more things change, the more they stay the same…

Before writing this, I went back and read Five Years. To be honest, my feelings haven’t changed much:

• Some days are hard. Really hard. Other days are a bit easier.
• The holidays and milestones are still rough
• The sound of an ambulance still derails me
• The smell of lavender has yet to enter my home or office
• Some memories continue to fade. Others are as sharp as the day they happened.
• I’ve never wished to give back a single moment to alleviate the pain

Six years. Wow. Among other milestones, you’d be a first grader.

In loving memory… today and always.

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By Vegasbab, October 21, 2009 10:48 pm

I lied. This post has no good. But, since it’s still my birthday, I can write whatever I want.

I’m so over this year it’s not even funny. I’d say it’s the worst yet, but I can’t really top losing a son and his father. However, I’d say this year comes pretty damn close.

1. Acid Reflux sucks. Hands down. It sucks the fun and life out of every. single. thing.
2. I lost my best friend. You know, that one person who knew EVERY secret. Literally.
3. I lost 2 more “friends” when I chose to leave the party at 1am vs. 3am. Apparently, I’m un-fun.
4. I made some really moronic business decisions. I’m paying every damn day.
5. And the Coup d’etat? Somewhere along the way I started caring for someone and wanting to believe their words. WTF.

Cheers to another ride around the sun.